Miss spell FTW

Off-Balance: sir if you look in that system folder, you will see an Ball icon

Off-Balance: *Bell

User: LOL, well that isnt where i normally keep my balls

user: where do you keep yours? Off-balance

Off-Balance: I keep then shaved, polished, and tucked behind my legs sir

User: LOL I JUST SPIT PEPSI ALL OVER MY MONITOR.

TMI, dude, TMI...

• Coworker: Thanks for watching chat. I needed to grab a shower.
• Coworker: When I get stinky, I get grumpy
• E Seven: that's... good to know?

Pansy

So new guy is telling us about how he has been attacked by multiple people during his last few jobs......... all the Tech staff can focus on is, dude so you were beat up by girls?

Chat Support HEADDESK

Following is a chat support log. Names and formatting have been changed for privacy, but the content itself is presented as it was originally written. This just goes to show that not all herps and derps are users' fault.

• User: I have 2 questions one about classes and one about [url redacted]
• Help Desk: akright lets here those two questions
• Help Desk: are you there
• User: yes sorry im also at work
• Help Desk: okay whats ur two questions
• User: ok for the classes i was wondering if i got a "d" in a math class does that mean that i didn't get credit for it and that i have to retake the class
• User: and for [url redacted] how to i change what im going to school for because it says im going for nursing and im not im going for early education
• Help Desk: it depends on the instructor sometimes they give u half a credit with a d
• User: but do i have to retake it to go into a the next math class
• Help Desk: yeah you will have to pass that class
• User: so a d is failing? that kinds sucks
• Help Desk: yeah cause d is almost lieka f
• Help Desk: d and f are th lowest frades u can get
• User: ok

vote for quote of the day 8/17/2011

1. is it good that your HR person Laughs hysterically at your exit interview?

2. whats wrong with you? did a Priest poop on your desk?

3. I like to feed my OCD Monkey

4. Dba: Oracle there is only one database
Drea: like highlander...there can be only one!
Dba: um....yeah...you like highlander?
Drea: how is that only a guy thing?
Off Balance: porn is a guy thing, and naked weds

Its Just Cold I Swear

Gis: Random school-user is saying that she accidently clicked something and now everything is very large

Bry: sounds like a display resolution setting

Kathy: Properties right?

Bry: yup, right click desktop

Gis: its not just the internet, its all her icons and software info

Gis: how would she fix it?

Off Balance: think of baseball

when life gives you Lemons make a Lemon Party

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

What's "undownloading"?

Coworker: Ticket Of The Day--

• Summary: jpig wont show up
• Work Log: we has change the browers to firefox, ie and then restarted the whole computer and we undownload abo. soft and download again

Me: 0_0 ... SO many things wrong with this.

Strip House?

E Seven: I'm getting a google maps link for this client, and there's a label near it that says "Strip House."
E Seven: Of course it's a restaurant, but that wasn't what I thought of first...

Library 404 Page

This page not found, thy search is for naught;
Go straight to the Library homepage, we implore!
Quoth the raven, "404."

Special Purpose

14:54) Paul: good to see u again
(14:54) Paul: and yes my -penis- has a special purpose
(14:57) Off Balance: father murphy?
(14:58) Paul: O_o

need naps

15:42) Am: NEED CAFFEINE!!!!!!
(15:42) Erik : I know me too
(15:42) Paul: mee three
(15:43) Off balance: me..... whatever comes after 3

No?

(11:22) V P: Hi P is there any way I can reset my computer I'm able to put in my tickets al saw what it is doing ?

yes?

What's Training?

E Seven: Is there a KB article for this process?
Coworker: No.
E Seven: So how do people know how to do it?
Coworker: Training?
E Seven: 0_0
E Seven: ...
E Seven: BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA ~sobs~!

quote of the day 8/05/2011

Bryan: I've changed supervisors more this month than some of our callers change their underwear

Ben: I keep my sh!tgun near my bed
Ben: I mean.....

Off Balance: is it good when you give your 2 weeks notice and you get a "LMFAO" in reply?

Off Balance: with E Seven's raw sexuallity and jons beard that is a dirty word waiting to happen

Off Balance: tell him I thought was scrolling through brazilian fart fetish porn, and assigned the work order incorrectly

Zen Help Desk

Sounds like a long day

Andrea: nuthing better then Thai Windows 7
Andrea: Argh now It's in French

Vote for quote of the day

Off-Balance- "who the F*@K is (random school) and why am I their Subject Matter Expert?"

Andria- "they say that (MALE BABY BATTER) can keep you alive if you are trapped somewhere"

Jere- "I am here to help you"
*jere leaves the room*

William- "we have a new tool to help with that"
*Off balance enters room*
Off balance- you called?

Clippy Can keep your secrets

Found this floating around the interwebz last week. How I wish it were real...