It was a long day

(15:17) Nat: Is Random School down? It just kicked me out and won't let me back in.
(15:18) Bryan: we haven't heard anything, anybody else having issues?
(15:19) Chris: checking
(15:19) Nat: It just let me back in.
(15:19) Chris: all good
(15:20) Nat: It usually doesn't kick me out for no reason.
(15:20) Nat: Thanks anyway.
(15:20) Chris: happens to me some times
(15:20) Bryan: may have just been a minor system interruption
(15:20) Chris: ^^
(15:23) Off Balance: i tried that excuse once

(15:23) Off Balance: she still wont call me back

He should have used magic missile

Inept USER: how do you access the computer on the second floor?

Off Balance, realizing the user is either drunk or stoned

Off Balance tells him to look for the rainbow gateway which

the guardian chipmunks protect from the roving ginger snap that want to eat the peaceful lollycins souls, he must be pure of heart and must possess the helm of twilight.

for the great master oglebump must consume the evil it contains.

when the great oglebump consumes the helm of twilight the great

awakening will commence. and we will see the twilight helm magically

project the path to the lost container of sassumical, there and only there

he will be able to face the great dragon of the 8th pearl.

when he has finished the dragon off and placed his 3rd gold tooth on the plate of giganator.

he will be able to access the computer on the 2nd floor.............or he could use his school ID and password

he asked me how to do the school ID thingy.

slowness equals ......... what?

13:37) John Obo: how do i tell if a student is handicapped or REALLY drunk?
(13:38) Ashley: say fart
(13:38) Ashley: wait, they'll both laff

Incomplete Credentials

Documentation submitted by a client:

1. Connect to [URL redacted]
2. Login to site with userid: [username redacted] and the current password for this account.

Lets forget about the poor grammar for now, though the rest of the submission would make an English teacher smack whoever wrote this. What I want to point out is that I did not redact the password. This is actually what it said. I feel like there should be a dude with his hands up as if to say "I dunno?"

(note: Contributor Voodoo Pork originally pointed this out)

This is actual Text from a chat I obviously I changed the names:

this chat lasted 30 secs

Off Balance says:
we would need to have the student call us
Off Balance says:
so we can confirm the issue
Jim says:
She did call and was told there was nothing you could do, that she had to speak with me.

Jim says:
Please give me your name and phone number and I will have her call you.

Jim says:
You still there?

Jim says:
HELLO!!

Help Desk says:
Website visitor has left the conversation

I don't want to know where...

via our HerpDerp member: Visine

Coworker: I don't think your friend got the Google joke.
Visine: I know, she is bucket-of-rocks smart anyway.
Coworker: truth
Visine: +5 stick of idiocy crammed somewhere

AAAAHHHHHHHMMMMMMMEEEENNNNNNN

submitted by our herp derp member: Visine

What the f%^& is up, If I have to send in one more paper for verification, then I will have to f&%# you up. Now get that s&$^ off of my to do list, nothing is needed for verif&$#ification d*(&%@. I'm a f&%$#@*& student. and that s&$# with
R(SCHOOLNAME), I already paid that s&$@. Now get it off of there, and I am not in no f&%#$ default. You guys better fix that s&%# right away.

some thing tells me he was a seminary student